The Niner player of the year and a lock to win the Len Eshmont award is Toi Lett Bowle the Turd (III). Unquestionably, he is a fan favorite of:
- Those who are so pi$$ed at the Niners play that they want to pee in their pants. But Toi is there to provide relief.
- Those who are so appalled at the Niners $hitty play that they want to drop their load on the spot. But Toi gives them the best seats in the house (Levi stadium lavatories).
- Those who are so drunk, they want to puke at every bad Niner play which means they are barfing on almost every play. But, Toi is always there to help prevent a messy situation.
Next Thursday night, both Niner and Raider fans get a chance of a lifetime to watch the Super Toilet Bowl of 2018. Toi’s twin brother, Turd Bowle the Turd.5 (III.5), plays for the Raiders is clearly their best player. This Thursday night match-up is shaping up to be the $hittie$t game of the year with no clear favorite and an over/under of 1. Vegas is taking bets on a 0-0 tie at the end of Overtime. Also, the over/under on turnovers is 31. Vegas isn’t clear which team will have 16 turnovers vs 15. The turf between the 40’s will be all worn out while both End Zones and Red Zones will be danced on only by the Gold Rush and Raiderettes. Lastly, Jed York has hired 1,000 Roto-rooter trucks for Thursday at Levi as the lavatories will sure to be backed-up. Toi is good but he ain’t Superman.
Around the League in all Sports:
- In MLB, the World Series is over. The LA Fodgers are Ducked !!! They have to deal with these clowns:
- Clayton Kershaw’s legacy will be as the worst highly paid MLB pitcher in World Series history.
- Manny Machado hasn’t washed his uniform ever since he joined the Fodgers, thus becoming the dirtiest player in MLB history.
- Yasiel Puig has a lock on the MLB all-time Punk Award.
- In the NBA, the Houston Rockets are 1-4 after not re-signing their two best defensive players from last year and adding Carmelo Anthony who hasn’t found the word “defense” in the dictionary because he doesn’t know how to spell it. They also added a player named Uri Knoll. He doesn’t care if guys pi$$ on him but watch out if someone spits on him. He’ll lose total control.